The Cold Hard Truth [Edge]

[Rydia]

Sigh. That was all Rydia could do anymore, sigh in distress, shake her head and rub her hands against her eyes. She’d gotten back from Mist and Baron not too long ago, and ever since she’d gotten to Mist and encountered one creepy fal’cie…well, she’d wanted nothing more than the crawl under a rock for all eternity and forget that focuses and brands even existed. Of course during her small trip away, she’d gotten distracted only slightly, by the anniversary of her mother’s death and meeting Rosa there, seeing her blond friend had made her feel better, especially with the encouraging words she had to say…Rosa always made Rydia feel better, but she was sure even the archer couldn’t help her out of this one. Along the way, an even bigger distraction had come along their path, and really, I mean a bigger distraction. Gladiolus and Kirtana, from another world and one obtaining the desert fever, who better to help than someone who’d been there before? Once all that was done and the two left though…there was nothing to distract Rydia anymore.

So…that’s why she was in the state she was in. Traveling back towards Eblan she’d had a lot of time to think, a lot of time to mull over Barthandules’ words and try to shake them from her head. It was just so creepy, catching her off guard like he had. She almost grimaced at the thought with a pained look on her face. ‘You will complete your focus or become a monster. Chose wisely l’cie, for in this game, there is no second chances, no ability to redo your mistakes. What will it be?’ that was the question, wasn’t it? Rydia was not so vain to kill two of her friends just so she could remain intact and keep away from being a monster for all eternity, but what human being wanted to turn into a mindless cie’th and wander the wilds, perhaps killing people and other creatures in your path? Rydia wanted none of that, not that eternal life sounded all that glamorous either.

Where was the third option where you escape your focus altogether?

Another sigh escaped the summoner’s lips as she pressed her elbows onto the top of a small table in the corner of a nearby tavern. Just outside of Eblan. She hadn’t gone to see Edge or anyone since her return, her mind was on other things lately, obviously. Holding her head up with her hands, she stared down at the table top, frowning and letting her eyes narrow. She’d not only been moping, but also strategizing, she didn’t know how to get rid of a brand, but if she was going to try she needed a plan…sort of. Nothing all that logical came to mind, there was always going to see some sort of healing mage, a powerful one at that. She knew Rosa was great with her white magic, but she’d rather go to anyone than her best friend, especially with the focus she was given. It was hard to keep things bottled up inside like this, and at some point Rydia was just going to bubble over with emotions and words, whether they made much sense or not, it would help…who was she to tell? Who was she to confide in for this horrible situation that had been bestowed upon her? Well, there was one individual that came to mind, but she wasn’t sure if she wanted to let anyone in on what her focus was.

Rydia’s focus was to kill Cecil Harvey – a man who had become an older brother figure to her, and Kain Highwind – a close friend that mattered to her as much as any of them. How could life be so cruel as to leave her with a terrible ultimatum? Kill your friends, or become a monster and die. There was no bright side to this where she came out on top, and that was the cold hard truth.

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Words:[/color] 760
Muse:[/color] Rushed, but good!
Tagged:[/color] Edge
Wearing:[/color] Her usual.
Listening To:[/color] Nothing!
Notes:[/color] Hope this was okay!

[Edge]

Edge wasn't sure if he should have been worried about Rydia or thanking God that she was intact after that run-in on Spira.

If nothing else, both of them had been provided with a good scare. She'd awoken from her unconscious state after the encounter with the machine...confused, but otherwise completely healthy for all she would let on to Edge. She was well enough to talk him out of keeping her safely in Eblan for at least a few days so he and the palace staff could monitor her. He had managed to convince her to come back here after she'd made her visit to mother's grave, though, after some convincing. The exterior guards had been informed to let him know if any green-haired young women arrived, and he'd just received word that someone had spotted her on the outskirts of the city. Edge had been waiting in anticipation at the palace for her, but after ten minutes...fifteen minutes...twenty minutes...no Rydia. He knew she tended to get distracted by things, but she knew he was concerned over her...or he hoped she did. Still, he thought she would have made her way onto the castle if there was something concerning she needed to tell him. He tried to believe the fact that she hadn't made her way the length of the city meant only good things for her trip to Mist, but Edge couldn't merely sit on his laurels, tapping his fingers and waiting for her, for more than thirty minutes.

After halting another conversation with a seneschal about "dream maidens" and such as that, Edge tossed on something that made him not look quite so king and headed out for some "fresh air." It wasn't totally a lie. Seeing Rydia again would be a breath of fresh air, even if she'd been gone for merely a few days. In reality, part of his expectations for seeing her was to talk her into staying here...permanently. Mist was no place to live right now, and Edge figured they both had at least one thing in common these days - they were rather lonely without their old friends around them. And who knew, maybe she'd learn to appreciate him a bit more than before if they spent some additional quality time together...

A few minutes and interruptions (God help these farmer's daughters) later, Edge had gone as far as the outer guard post without passing Rydia. Not obscenely abnormal. She could have gone shopping for all he knew. But just to be sure, Edge ascended up the few steps that led to the post, drawing the attention of the guard who'd sent a runner to inform Edge that Rydia had returned. "Have you seen her since?", Edge directly asked, and the man bowed before shaking his head. "No, your highness. She approached an hour ago and didn't appear set on going anywhere in particular. I don't know about women, my lord, but she didn't appear happy." Edge sighed at the comment and turned away, looking to the streets. "If you spot her coming back this way, mention I was looking for her." Dismissing the guard, Edge descended back down the steps, taking to the streets in search for the summoner. The palace could wait up for him a bit longer, after he'd ducked through the businesses here and made sure he couldn't find Rydia. Unhappy...was it merely the anniversary of her mother's death that bothered her? Edge wasn't naive enough to believe it could be that simple. Not with all she'd been through these past weeks.

Words - 654
Muse - Great!
Notes - Dunno what this is. XD I figured they could use one more until he finds her or whatever. [/size]

[Rydia]

Resting one arm on the table while elevating her head with said arm, Rydia just frowned, her eyes narrowed as if she were inspecting the top of the table, which she wasn’t really doing, just thinking way too hard for her own good. Tapping her other hand lightly against the wood, not even hard enough to make noise, the less attention she drew to herself – which wasn’t easy to accomplish even just by her attire and color associated with herself - the better. She was glad that this small little tavern was practically empty, a few patrons here and there, some came and went, but no lingerers that would recognize her stay, the obvious unhappy look on her face, and she hoped that no brave soul tried to come near her to chat, or try to make her happy again. She knew that sometimes places like this were supposed to be a social environment, to talk about your troubles with some complete strangers and maybe find a solution, but that was the last thing the jade haired summoner wanted, she wanted to remain isolated.

Glancing away from the table top and around the room, Rydia wondered how long she’d actually been in here. Judging by the looks of things, she’d assumed it’d been an hour or so, maybe a little less, maybe a little more, but she’d go with that for a rough guess. Did she want to stay in here much longer? Not really, but there wasn’t much of anywhere she could go to think this hard and not be disturbed. Wandering the streets would certainly draw attention to herself, wandering outside of Eblan just wasn’t smart, considering portals were unstable, popping up, and those creatures that came out of them…well, she didn’t want to press her already very bad luck. If anything got worse from here, she’d be surprised, but that wasn’t a risk she was willing to take. This tavern was safe, it was safe from the elements, she could remain alone for awhile, but already her thoughts were starting to die down, she’d ran over the same subject, mulled over it for quite some time, anything that came to mind wouldn’t be something she hadn’t already thought about, nothing new, nothing worth spending time over again.

Shifting in her seat a bit, Rydia sat up instead of draping herself over the table and looking just as frustrated and flustered as she felt. Clasping her hands together she continued to look around the tavern, to try and get her mind on something else. She knew it would’ve been smart to head towards the palace and inform certain kings of her safety. She was sure she wasn’t the only one worrying about that incident that happened on Spira, but Rydia…she knew what it meant finally, that’s the part that scared her the most. As much as she wanted to know what was going on, now that she knew, she wished she was completely clueless. If she ever saw that fal’cie again…ugh, no sense in getting worked up over things that would probably never happen. He’d said his words, ruffled her feathers and made her realize her focus, that was what he set out to do and he accomplished it, now, the only thing this ‘tool’ would fail at, would be completing her focus.

“Do you need anything, Miss?” Rydia’s head jerked in the direction of the voice, her eyes settling upon a tavern worker who’d come to see if she needed anything – first time someone had approached her since coming in here. Blinking for a second, Rydia lowered her gaze back to where it had been a few moments prior. “One.” She stated quietly, and that was well understood, one drink, that was all she wanted, and it was something she had never really taken advantage of. She was an adult, and thus, was going to be treated like one. Perhaps it would take the edge off of all these things she was feeling right now – no pun intended of course. After this, she’d decided it would be a good idea to travel back to the palace, see what was going on and try to figure out things from there.

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Words:[/color] 795
Muse:[/color] Good!
Tagged:[/color] Edge
Wearing:[/color] her usual.
Listening To:[/color] Nothing
Notes:[/color] --

[Edge]

Edge's investigative skills were top-of-the-line, so he knew finding a very obvious-looking summoner in his city full of lightly armored ninja, farmers, tradesmen and merchants shouldn't have been too much of a problem. Yet Rydia always had a way of...being evasive without actually meaning to be. She would have made a pretty good ninja in another life. Edge checked nooks, crannies, fruit stands, clothing stands, a gypsy caravan that had stopped in the city, the city baths and even bothered to make sure Rydia hadn't suddenly got an inkling for a massage. All were attractions within range of the city entrance, and none of them had drawn the attention of his friend. A few individuals had been asked about her. They'd mentioned noticing her, but not noticing exactly where she'd gone when she'd passed. At least he knew she was here in the city somewhere by those slightly unhelpful reports. He considered if he shouldn't go back to the palace and wait for her there to ensure they didn't completely miss each other, but he'd be told if she was to arrive there while he was away. And he had nothing better to do this afternoon than pursue a beautiful woman...so he continued on with his search, unperturbed by his failure thus far. She was here somewhere, he only had to dig a little deeper to find her.

His searching, after a pair of failed stops and a short chat with a man who'd retired from the military, Edge's casual search carried him into one of the city's taverns - a good one, by his standards, and one he'd frequented as a prince when he could sneak away and be unrecognized by the patrons. Even as a king, Edge had at least some amount of anonymity so long as he wasn't in ceremonial dress. He looked like any other ninja, albiet one wearing royal armor, to most unless they knew him by his eyes and hair (with Edge's hair color being common to Eblani natives). The people in here who would recognize him knew to keep their mouths shut, so as he stepped in just to check, doubting Rydia would be anywhere around alcohol, he exchanged a respectful nod with the bartender along with a shake of his head to indicate he didn't want anything. Then he went on about his business, undisturbed by people who wouldn't realize their king walked among them.

One would recognize him, though.

Edge peered at the form in the corner he could swear was Rydia. He would have sworn well if he'd done so out loud. Raising an eyebrow slightly, he started stepping towards her, trying to discern what it was she had in front of her. Was that...a drink? Edge had never known her to express any kind of interest in drinking...not that he'd ever been to a tavern with her aside from the few times the two of them and the rest of the party needed a place to stay for the night. But...still, it wasn't what he expected. If he'd been worrying any at all while he'd been searching for her, that worry spiked seeing her cooped up in a corner with a drink. He made an obvious approach, sliding into the seat opposite her. "The brandy here is especially good. Troxler, the bartender, has them in pints," Edge said to her, quietly, before he settled into his seat and rested a cheek in his hand, gazing at the possibly dejected-looking summoner (though he thought he might be gauging her wrong, it was dark) across from him. "Are you alright?", he asked, genuinely. He wasn't sure he wanted to hear the answer.

Words - 676
Muse - Excellent!
Notes - Lemme know if I should change anything. :3[/size]

[Rydia]

It would be a complete understatement if one were to say Rydia was simply depressed. In fact, she felt more than miserable, almost a sickening feeling welling up in her stomach as she sat in her little corner of solitude within the small tavern. Her facial expression definitely looked less than pleased, her eyes simply gazing at the drink in front of her, though she hadn’t touched it just yet. She wasn’t afraid of stuff like this, it was just the horrors of a focus she was given…that was what scared her. Consider this…drowning out her sorrows. She’d heard of it before, but never believed it to be the best option, but hell, solitude and getting a chance to forget things was always nice, too bad people had to take worse measures to get to that state of mind. With a distinct frown on her face, Rydia just sighed heavily to herself before laying her arms across the small table she had, placing her forehead down on the table, frustrated so much with herself and anything else in her life right now, it was a lot to take in.

Hearing footsteps within the tavern, new footsteps, they had a different and almost quieter rhythm, she looked up and as the sight of Edge came to her eyes, Rydia almost wanted to flinch back against her seat, remembering how Barthandules, the fal’cie who’d burned this idea of no way out of a focus into her brain, had taken the form of Edge and snuck up on her, catching her completely off guard, but she refrained from any frightful gestures, simply staring at him for a few seconds before dropping her eyes again. Hearing him speak, the way he spoke, it was different than the Edge that had turned out to be a creepy fal’cie, she could trust that this was no farce, after all, Barthandules got the message across. She would complete her focus and all that other crap that she didn’t want to believe. She’d do whatever it took to keep herself from taking the lives of two of her best friends, those she considered family, it would be one of the worst things she could ever do, no one could know about the details of her focus, not Cecil, not Kain, and definitely not Rosa. There was one person who probably deserved to know.

‘Are you alright?’

Ha, that was probably the best question anyone could’ve asked her today. With a tiny saddened smile appearing on her lips as she straightened up and put herself in a more polite and less down in the dumps light, she shrugged her shoulders. Playing the nice and happy girl she usually was wasn’t something she wanted people to buy into. After all, getting things off your chest generally made you feel better, right? Letting her smile fade slightly, she rested one hand on the table and the other poked at the glass that was still in front of her, untouched. “I guess both yes and no.” She mumbled, green eyes lifting slightly with a small sigh. It was best to blurt things out, but something caused Rydia to finally lift up the glass and take the first drink, though not downing it, it was enough to burn her nose. Whatever, she was an adult. “I should’ve come straight to the palace, I’m sorry.” Shaking her head, she let out a small laugh of disbelief, leaning her elbows on the table. “My trip though…I’ve got quite a bit to tell you, Edge. And none of it is about Rosa, or even my purpose for going. I think I’ve finally discovered what this brand means…” her voice trailed, biting her bottom lip, she wasn’t sure where to start, so leaving it at that, she wanted to see how eager or concerned he seemed about it, or if it was just another topic to let pass by.

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Words:[/color] 751
Muse:[/color] Great!
Tagged:[/color] Edge!
Wearing:[/color] Her usual.
Listening To:[/color] Get yourself back home: Gym Class Heroes
Notes:[/color] --

[Edge]

Edge couldn't have guessed what had happened during Rydia's trip, but he knew whatever it was, it had been enough to tear his friend down to a lower point than he was used to seeing from her.

Though reading people flawlessly - at least, reading their emotions - was not something Edge would count among his talents, he was able to tell enough about Rydia even in the dimly lit tavern to make a few judgments. She was having to work hard to produce a smile. Had the visit to the grave not gone as planned? Had Rosa told her something that was bothering her? If Edge had been planning on knocking the poor girl out with questions, he surely could have done it. But with Rydia already upset enough to be drinking, an activity he'd never seen her bother with until today, he was well aware that the last thing he needed to do was to add on to her mood by being any sort of nuisance. All he needed to present were three simple words that couldn't possibly suffice to show his concern but would serve their purpose nonetheless.

...Partially serve their purpose. Rydia was being oddly cryptic here and he wasn't entirely sure why. Narrowing his eyes slightly in confusion, Edge dropped his hand down from his face and clasped them in front of him on the table, leaning in to listen more intently and study the eyes across from him that were worth staring at even when he wasn't trying to search for some sort of truth in them. She disappeared behind her glass, though, leaving Edge to sadly stare at her as she did so. Why hadn't he gone with her on the trip? Of all the stupid things he could have done, letting her take the long trip by herself after she'd been through the encounter with the machine in Spira. And now she was apologizing to him when he was the one that needed to apologize to her. "Don't apologize," he told her lightly, sure he looked like a living, breathing apology when he said it. After, this, he was going to need a drink as well. Probably four or five of them if his worries as to what happened were in any way accurate. He prayed to God they weren't.

After a laugh that may have been genuine or forced, with Edge too on-edge to tell, the explanation started slowly but surely. Okay, so it wasn't about Rosa or the visit to the grave. That disproved two of his theor- the brand? The mark on her leg was the cause of all this, then. He wasn't entirely sure he liked the word "brand" used in relation to it. One branded livestock, not human beings. Edge couldn't see the tattoo...brand...through the table, obviously, but his eyes flicked down to where it would have been nonetheless. "What does it mean, Rydia?", Edge asked as he turned his gaze back up to her face, encouraging her to discredit all of the disturbing notions in his mind about the meaning of the brand that always led to a worst-case scenario. What if it wasn't as bad as he thought? What if branding meant...she only had to...perform some sort of...duty for the machine that it could no longer perform, being a rust-bucket in the middle of a shoreline. It could be that she-

Edge pressed his teeth together and forced himself to stop, blinking to cover his frustration. God helped him if her explanation turned out to be as bad as the feeling in his stomach reminded him it could be... After a pause, Edge reached his hand slowly across the table and gave Rydia a light rub on the arm, trying to give her the boost she may have needed to explain what she'd learned.

Words - 689
Muse - Excellent!
Notes - Nothing too much![/size]

[Rydia]

How exactly was she going to explain this one? Rydia kept her mind racing, her thoughts continuing to go back to everything that Barthandules had said to her, how he approached her and caught her so off guard, the terrible words he’d spilled to her, making her realize the horror that was her focus. Shaking her head slightly, remembering the words as they echoed through her head, she had her hands clasped together tightly, trying not to let anything else cross her face that would show that she was either upset, fearful or a combination of both. “That’s all you are, is simply tools, to be used however we please. Really, you hadn’t thought you would actually survive being a l’cie, did you?” It was a terrifying thing to remember, she had to believe the words of the fal’cie that had spoken to her, after all, she didn’t know anything about being a l’cie, a servant to these mechanical beings and nothing more. To them, humans were tools, expendable, nothing of importance, and that was something else that bothered the summoner.

“You’ll bend, l’cie. As nothing but a tool, you do what you’re told. Nothing can save you,”

Blinking for a second as the words continued to echo through her mind, Rydia then turned her gaze back to Edge, trying to put a smile on but ultimately failing, having only reached half a smile and becoming torn down by…well not exactly depression, but the idea of not being able to save herself, not being able to do something about this that would get herself out of it alive and keep her friends safe. The fact that Barthandules had threatened Edge’s life along with the taunting of her own, that had sent the summoner over the edge, enough to become so sour about everything, though she did well to keep her spirits up upon meeting Rosa and their small journey from Mist to Baron. “I guess I should sort of…start from the beginning.” She commented to herself, using the back of her hand to scoot the drink away from being in front of her and letting herself have a nice open area should she want to gesture with her hands or anything, but for the most part…she was pretty calm and not in the mood to tell grand stories, this was just for Edge’s sake, he had the right to know after all.

With a deep breath, Rydia thought back, it wasn’t a pleasant thing to do, but she did it anyways so that she could explain it better. “I was in Mist a few days before Rosa was to meet me there, I figured some alone time to think would do me some good, it was there in the fields outside of town I had come across a very unusual sort of being. They’re called the fal’cie, that machine we encountered in Spira, that too was a fal’cie.” She explained, not having moved her gaze or her hands, or any part of her. She was set on telling this story, not even a story, just an explanation of what had happened, maybe then he’d understand why she seemed to cryptic, so down and gloomy this afternoon. “The fal’cie pick people to do their bidding, that’s where the brand came from. It assigns you a task and you are fulfilled to do it or…” her voice trailed before she cleared her throat, sort of to switch subjects from her focus to what had happened in Mist, she’d get to her task later if she could even muster the words.

“Anyways, this fal’cie Barthandules…he can change forms. Literally, he can change how he looks and for some reason…he…appeared to me as you, catching me off guard of course but…in the end everything had been explained, he said that there was no escaping such a fate, if you do not fulfill your focus…” and reality smacked her in the face. Feeling her lips twitch a bit, her hands shook slightly, she held her breath for a moment, feeling a painful sob work its way through her chest, she did well to hold it in for a few moments. Water pricked at her eyes before she closed them tight and quickly folded her arms on the table, dropping her head to rest of them, green hair flowing over her arms as her shoulders shook, a muffled and sob filled voice came from her. “You turn into a monster. Those monsters we…we…saw before getting to Spira…you turn into one of…of those…for all of eternity!” there was no escaping it, it was either turn to crystal or be a monster…Rydia wanted neither, but what choice did she have?

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Words:[/color] 926
Muse:[/color] Great!
Tagged:[/color] Edge!
Wearing:[/color] Her usual
Listening To:[/color] Wide Awake: Katy Perry
Notes:[/color] I actually feel bad for a character of mine for once God I'm a horrible person!

[Edge]

And so, here came the explanation. Edge was sure he would have looked uncharacteristically terrified himself if not for the mask covering his lower face, but his eyes studied the summoner with clear anxiety, holding her own gaze. She was obviously preparing to drop some kind of bomb on him. The realization had his heart beating uncharacteristically high. Edge was not a man free of worries, even if he did just take them all, decide he could handle them and generally keep them close to the chest in favor of being his usual, unperturbed self. Right now, though, he was dealing with something that involved a friend and something that clearly bothered her more than simply some...tangible enemy, which Edge could handle with sword and armor and keep her protected from. No, this was something deeper...and right up until Rydia began explaining it to him, he thought the expectation was going to drive him mad. He remained gazing at her, still trying to comfort a bit, until she spoke. Edge braced with arms folded, preparing to absorb the coming onslaught.

It did have to do with the...machine...fal'Cie...in Spira, then. Agh, why hadn't he pulled her way from it faster? Why had he screwed up when it had trapped her as it had? And what good did it do to think back on that now? Getting angry at himself wouldn't do Rydia any good. She went on, explaining that the brand meant she had to do some sort of..task? It was branding people and making them slaves? How could something like that be allowed to live on in Spira...and how had one gotten here on Earth to do the same thing? Edge wasn't even sure what he should be mad at, but was mad at it nonetheless. That left him to wonder what the machine had left Rydia to do, which...maybe that was what was bothering her so much? If it was an easy task, it didn't sound like a big deal. Edge, however, would never be naive enough to believe that he'd heard the whole, damning story yet.

His fists balled up. If he could get his hands on a fal'Cie... Imitating him to get to Rydia? He was sure it was unreasonable to feel such a way - ninja were prone to their own trickery and illusions - but Edge would have been perfectly happy to show a fal'Cie what it earned by taking his appearance and hurting someone he cared about by use of it. And he would have loved to pop up, tell Rydia where he could find this fal'Cie, and do just that. But now wasn't the time...especially when he saw Rydia's countenance change and her voice fail her. So here it came, didn't it? If one didn't complete their focus, something happened to them that was bothering Rydia much more than any of the rest of her experiences. Edge almost didn't know what to do, seeing her essentially trembling before him, but he finally linked a hand with hers hopelessly. This was bad...really bad.

He felt his entire body collapse when she finally told him, both from the sound of her voice and from the actual fact.

A monster.

Edge leaned back in his seat, defeated. A slave to a task that turned one into a lumbering, vicious monster if it wasn't completed. Edge didn't...no one deserved this at all, but least of all Rydia. She would never harm a fly if it hadn't tried to harm her first, and she did plenty for everyone without having some...machine taking her for its own little servant. For a moment, Edge was just too wiped out by the revelation to really react, but once he looked back to the summoner before him, he slipped from his side of the table and slid in beside her, pulling her into a tight hug. It wasn't all over, after all. As bad as it was and as much as it had shut down Edge's mind from having to think about Rydia turning into a monster, he did know that, apparently, if this task was finished she...would be okay, maybe? "We're going to finish this task for you, and avoid this," he finally spoke up and said to her, determination in his voice. "Or I will if you can't."

Words - 785
Muse - Excellent!
Notes - Hope the godmod is okay. :3[/size]

[Rydia]

It was difficult enough to put a mask over her face, to seem not quite as down and worried as she was internally. Ultimately, she knew it wouldn’t be long until everything spilled out, talking about things generally did help, but this was a subject Rydia would’ve wanted to avoid until the end of time, but hey, at least for her it didn’t seem the end would take that long. With the focus she was given, she might as well just lay around and wait for that fateful day to take her away. There was just no way she could take the lives of two friends. That was the part that saddened her the most. She was given an ultimatum, kill or be killed technically. Still, she hadn’t gotten that far in her explanation, nor did she ever want to reach that point, she knew that even the information she was presenting to Edge would be hard to take in…but the focus? She didn’t even want to imagine the reaction then.

Rydia was doing a fairly good job thus far as she explained things, it wasn’t easy, especially reliving those memories of a creepy fal’cie telling her all the answers as clear as day, it was just horrifying. How she hadn’t been a complete mess upon seeing Rosa, Rydia wasn’t sure how she’d survived that one without breaking into a mess of tears. Here, this was a completely different story. She didn’t need to keep up some sort of façade with Edge like she had to do with Rosa, not to mention she’d been distracted during the duration of her trip to Mist and back, she’d given herself no time to wallow in self pity, but now just seemed like the perfect time, finally those bottles of emotions were exploding, and poor Edge was the one who had to hear and see it all.

Basically this focus ordeal was like pulling the rug out from under Rydia’s feet. Here she was falling flat on her face with no way to catch herself, she needed to fall and just take things as they went, for the sake of her friends and their families. Shaking her head slightly as she got to some of the bad news, Rydia felt a hand clasp hers, not that it really did anything to slow her worries, but it made her eyes stop blinking as fast, trying to find the correct words to explain everything. She was going to turn into a monster should she fail, and a crystal should she succeed, but how was she to eliminate the lives of two people she cared deeply for? That would affect tons of people in the long run? It was a selfish thing to think about, and Rydia being as selfless as she was…she just…couldn’t do it, it wasn’t in her nature to take another life unless in self defense, and even then she felt bad, at least on the inside, she hadn’t voiced her thoughts on those types of things all that much, not until now at least.

The bomb had been dropped.

You turned into a monster, and that was that. Rydia let that mask of hers fade away, replacing it with all of her emotions spilling out in all sorts of ways. Shoulders heaving, quiet sobs in her chest, but this wasn’t even the worst part of it all! Working up to the biggest of all bad news reveals…Rydia just needed a moment to work out a bit of her emotions before going into an even bigger tear fest, or whatever she was going to do once the focus was revealed. Being just a hot mess of blubbering and trying to form words that just didn’t sound recognizable in the slightest, Rydia then was pulled into a tight hug, that was much more comforting than holding hands, but she took advantage, having placed her head against his shoulder and just trying to taking deep breaths so that she could form words again, real words.

Having a sense of security was nice, and it almost started to calm her down some, but nothing was going to help all that much, especially when Edge said this task would be completed. Lifting her head up quickly, she shook her head and moved some of her hair from her face. “No no no no no.” she repeated with almost a ghostly pale shade on her face. “You don’t understand, this is a task no one can complete. I…I refuse.” She mumbled out almost frantically. It was best just to get things out in the open so that at least he could understand why she refused. “I will not bring harm to Cecil or Kain…they have lives, Cecil, a family…no matter what becomes of me, I cannot tear that away from Rosa, nor the kingdom of Baron.” Hopefully her concerning words could get the point across to Edge as to what her focus was, if not, the next few words certainly would. “I’d much rather accept my fate than eliminate my friends.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Words:[/color] 955
Muse:[/color] Excellent!
Tagged:[/color] Edge
Wearing:[/color] Her usual
Listening To:[/color] Stuffs~!
Notes:[/color] I had muse! So much muse!

[Edge]

Edge could take Rydia having an objective she had to complete, even if it did infuriate and worry him to no end. The task could be completed somehow, could it not? He completely understood that she would be upset nonetheless at the prospect of failing and becoming a monster...but to pull her out of his rut, he had to make sure he assured her that she could get this done. What was the task, though? What would some damned machine want her to do? Fix it? Find...something? Find someone? Edge's mind was already working, as he sat there trying his best to comfort her, on ways to figure out ways to get back to Spira and figure out what the hell the machine wanted...or to hack it to bits and make it release her from this slavery it had imposed upon her. Both options sounded fine, but for now, Edge had to do his best to calm and reassure her. Stroking the top of her head lightly, he tried to give his assurances.

But they seemed to concern her even more. Surprised by her reaction, he looked at her and tried to discern what she was trying to tell him here. That he couldn't complete her task for her? "What is it?", he asked, before she went on to explain and crush whatever hopes he'd been stubbornly holding onto. His anger at the fal'Cie grew with each passing word. Cecil and Kain? It wanted her to harm Cecil and Kain? What vendetta did some foreign machine have against them all to wish that kind of a fate on any of them? His mind became muddled with questions, and before he knew it, his fist had hit the tabletop. "What right does it h-", he began, before realizing he wasn't helping anything with this sort of reaction. He rolled his shoulders back, and brought a hand to his forehead. It had almost been easier than this when his parents had died. At least he'd had something to fight against - Rubicante had been his target. Now, he didn't know what to go after...and he'd known his parents had fought before the end, too, against the puppeteer that had been pulling their strings. Rydia wasn't going to get that chance... He knew for a fact that what she said was true. She would never be able to lay a finger on Cecil, especially...and even Kain.

He slumped again, the anger that had been maintaining him gone. "I can't just let you-", he began again. Couldn't let her what? Die without killing an older brother figure and a man who - even if she held her reservations about him like the rest of them did - was completely innocent in this affair? No, what she should be going after was the monster that had started all this...or the freak that had taken Edge's form to get to her and tell her all of this. Edge took in a breath. "The machines...if we kill them, will they release you?", he asked, oh so hoping she told him yes. Edge didn't care what they were so long as the end of their existence meant Rydia's safety. If she told him no, well...he would still probably go after the machines. What else he would do would be another story entirely. But he knew he could not just sit idly by and let this happen...he cared too much for that. Way, way too much.

Words - 638
Muse - Excellent!
Notes - These poor, pathetic people. XD [/size]

[Rydia]

There was no way Rydia was finishing this task, nor was she going to let Edge even think about finishing it for her. If anything, she just wanted to sit here, blubber about it for a little bit, and then live the rest of her life as normal as possible, if that was even able to be accomplished. The short life she’d had thus far got even shorter. Living a full seven to eight years, not even really having a childhood…no teenage years…no help with anything, she’d been thrown straight into adulthood upon reaching the feymarch, and now…here she was, a time limit strapped to her leg and telling her when she was going to die. How nice was that? The reaction from Edge had been expected, but the fist on the table had caused Rydia’s eyes to move to the table, she didn’t want to make anyone angry here but…what else was she going to do? There really was no one else she could turn to.

With a bit of silence, Rydia tried to collect her thoughts once more, sorting them out and taking a few deep breaths to be able to speak again without the breaks in her tone or anything. She needed to collect herself and not seem so distressed, not that it would necessarily change Edge’s thoughts, but it would maybe…ease her own? If she wasn’t breaking down, if she was being happy about the life she had lived thus far, instead of how short of a life she had left…then maybe she could feel better. A more optimistic view, seeing the glass half full instead of half empty. There wasn’t anything she could do. There was no loophole of which she knew, but hey…miracles had happened before, if something happened and she was able to be saved, then she’d do everything in her power to save her skin, maybe…maybe seeing Leviathan would be wise? Asura? They might have some words of wisdom…but these Fal’cie were foreign even to the Feymarch…how would they know what she was dealing with?

“Nothing is to be done regarding this. I just…wanted to get this information out. Drowning myself in sorrows won’t make it better, and completing said task definitely won’t make things better. I think…it needs to be left alone.” But of course that wasn’t going to happen. With Edge’s next question, Rydia couldn’t really provide him with an answer, but…the question seemed legit. Never had she thought of something like that. “I…am not sure. Fal’cie are beings way beyond someone like me. I doubt that destroying them would destroy the focus…but…I don’t…know.” She said with a half hearted shrug as her eyes lowered to the table, a distinct frown on her face, but no longer the upset blubber of a mess she was moments ago. Still, there was no getting rid of this sickening feeling that was simply tying her stomach into knots, causing her heart to sink…everything she ever dreamed of…shattered right before her eyes.

Shaking her head slightly and just sinking back in the seat, the summoner felt a small, very saddened smile pull at her lips. “My mother died when she was quite young. She hadn’t gotten to live her life very much beyond me. She had to protect Mist…but that life was cut short. It just feels like…I’m repeating everything. Yet not even getting a chance at life.” It was complicated. There was no future to look forward to. No being a real adult, no settling down and having a life somewhere around Mist, or anywhere else in the world. What kind of life was that anyways? It was times like this Rydia wished she was a simple child again, no burdens to bear…no complications to deal with…no really big dreams lost.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Words:[/color] 757
Muse:[/color] Good
Tagged:[/color] Edge
Wearing:[/color] Her usual
Listening To:[/color] Shattered: Trading Yesterday
Notes:[/color] I'll be sure to get her blubbering again, just as planned.

[Edge]

"Thanks for telling me," Edge mumbled lightly out to her, knowing what it felt like to have to keep a burden piled on your own shoulders. Hell, he didn't care how much it was going to worry him. Better that he worry than she trudged on trying to handle this thing on her own...though it seemed like Edge couldn't do anything to fix it, either. How could he honestly go and kill Cecil and Kain for her? If they'd been anyone else - any random people - he would have done so in a second and carried that blood on his hands willingly. Kain, maybe he could bring himself to kill. Kain had...his issues and Edge didn't really think as highly of him as the rest of the pack during their fight with Zemus. The rest of the pack likely didn't put him on much of a pedestal, either. If it were Kain or Rydia, Edge knew who his choice would be, as would most. Cecil, though...not only did Edge think a lot of Cecil, even if he was a bit of a prude, but he was also the king of Baron. Killing him would...well, Edge couldn't even begin to think about the problems. He was a ninja, yes, but no- agh, why was he even thinking about the act? He couldn't do that to Rosa...nor Rydia, who thought of him as an older brother. It would be like killing both of them, too. Edge's free hand moved to rub at his face. Damn. This. Fal'Cie.

Speaking of the others. "Who else knows?", he gathered the strength to calmly ask. He imagined Rydia might have told Rosa already...even Cecil might have known, but he was more doubtful. Edge would have expected a letter from the king of Baron instantly if he'd found out, probably to tell Edge to keep an eye on her or send her to Baron to have their white mages look into the case. Heh, not even Eblan's ninjitsu could do anything to save Rydia...and they possessed as much arcane magic in this ninja culture as any corner of the world. Edge almost felt like another confidant knowing about the situation would comfort him as much as Rydia. Feeling as if he was the only person in the world aside from Rydia to understand what was going on was also an imposing challenge. The thought made him pull her into another hug, as if she'd start falling apart if he wasn't careful.

At the very least, Edge could take heart in her response about the fal'Cie. She didn't know, so that didn't mean it was impossible to get her released from this task by killing one of them. "I'm willing to try," he said, able to gather a little more confidence in his voice. "I'll take twenty of my best men and try to find another portal back to Spira and the machine." It was on the tip of his tongue to tell her not to come, but was that really fair? This was something she wanted to change as well, surely, and Rydia was arguably the strongest among them all with her summons and magic, so long as she had someone to defend her in close combat, as Edge had done countless times while Cecil had done the same for Rosa. But the thought of the machine....damn it, he couldn't get that image of her being tied up by the machine out of his head. But this time...this time he'd be ready, and they all would be ready. No mistakes. It was them or the fal'Cie, and Edge hated to tell the fal'Cie, but with as motivated as he was to rid the world of it, the fal'Cie was going to be the one put down. Not him, not Rydia.

Edge's gaze moved back to the summoner as she continued, shaking his head at her ability to smile in this situation. She was ten times the person he was...it was what had attracted him to her at first, even beyond any elegant beauty. She was right, too... Cecil and Kain had been the ones to fight and kill her mother, hadn't they? Edge had heard the story before, and knew the circumstances. They'd done what they had to in order to survive. What they had to in order to survive...or to save a friend. Edge pressed his eyes shut and took in a breath, trying to avoid thinking about it too much. "Rydia...I'm going to do everything within my power - and maybe more - to make sure you don't end up a victim of this. That I can promise you. I'm not going to tell you to stay here in Eblan, but...letting you go back out into the world alone while you're facing this..."

Words - 880
Muse - Excellent!
Notes - I think he's going to melt.[/size]

[Rydia]

Rydia wouldn’t have told Edge anything had she thought she could hold the feelings inside. She’d reached her limit, and letting those facts and emotions loose was the only thing she could do to keep herself from going completely mad on the inside. Besides, he’d been with her when the act happened, he deserved to know, no matter how difficult it was to comprehend and understand, even Rydia was still a bit foggy in the mind about it all, but one thing she knew she couldn’t do was complete the focus. Never would she lay a hand on Cecil, or even think about completing her focus. It was better to let fate take its course from here, why destroy many lives with her focus when she could simply be removed from the picture and nothing would be wrong? Of course she knew some people would be at least mildly disturbed and feel bad for the loss of her, but all and all, one person wasn’t worth it, at least that was her mindset.

With a small nod towards Edge, Rydia kept a bit quiet, unsure of what to say, what to do, but all she could really do was sit there and stare at the table, her eyes slightly glazed over as her mind had plunged in and out of deep thoughts between words. It was difficult to have such a weight on your shoulders, and she knew everyone had their burdens, but she didn’t want to throw her problems on Edge’s shoulders, that wasn’t what she wanted…that wasn’t why she had told him. “You’re the only one he knows of my focus. Rosa knows something is wrong, but that’s as much as I will allow her to know.” She said looking straight ahead, knowing her blonde friend was worried for her, and Rydia had nearly heaved a sigh of relief when she hadn’t pried, otherwise she wasn’t sure what she would’ve done. No one else could know about her focus, she didn’t need a pity party trailing after her, nor did she want anyone’s sympathy…there just had to be that one person you needed to tell everything to, the one you trusted to keep it just between the himself and you.

All and all, Rydia just felt like the rug had been pulled from under her feet, she’d been left to fall and now she needed to try and pick herself back up without falling again. It was difficult, she was fragile in terms of emotions, but her mind had been made up. Pulled into a tight hug again, it was…comforting to say the least, someone knew, someone cared and was willing to go out and help her with whatever she needed – not that she wanted that – but it was still nice to know that someone was there for you. “The portals seem to be rather unstable, are you sure that is wise? Say you do find your way back to Spira, and say you do find that same fal’cie, what happens when all that effort is for nothing? Lives could potentially be lost, and…I would never want that.” She put a faint smile on her lips, looking towards him and trying to collect her emotions again, otherwise she was sure there would be no convincing him otherwise. “Perhaps, we should just leave things as they are, and search for a different and safer way out of this? I mean…I’m not just going to lay down and die, but hunting something that may or may not hold answers just doesn’t seem worth the effort.”

The part that really hit home was when he practically invited her to stay within Eblan during all of this. Though her place resided within Mist, helping them rebuild – which was going along fantastically even without her guidance – she was really taken by surprise at the suggestion, more or less. Thinking about it for a moment, giving herself some silence instead of just jumping into words that may or may not be what she wanted to say, she took in a deep breath and exhaled it through a sigh. “If you think that is best, I cannot argue with you, I would much rather stay here than be out in the middle of nowhere…” her voice trailed for a moment, drifting into thoughts again, she felt more emotions well up within her chest, though they weren’t exactly the horror filled sobs that she had earlier, the formation of water came to her eyes again, a half hearted smile on her face. “Thank you, for…everything. For listening…and better yet…for being that one person I knew I could run to with such a problem.” A simple thank you, it was certainly the least she could do, wasn’t it?

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Words:[/color] 914
Muse:[/color] Great! (Though I’m falling asleep while writing?)
Tagged:[/color] Edge!
Wearing:[/color] Already linked/said
Listening To:[/color] Something that’s making me tired xD
Notes:[/color] --

[Edge]

Edge couldn't be sure if it was the best or the worst thing that Rosa didn't have any clue about what was really the problem...even if she knew there was a problem. It was the best for her undoubtedly, and probably the best for Rydia, too, to know she hadn't put such a burden on a friend to basically choose between her arguably closest friend and her husband. It was only the worst thing because really, Edge was the only person Rydia really could tell. He was beyond thankful that she had, because not knowing while seeing her in this state would have gotten to him even more than the actual news did...but it was strange, knowing he was really the only real comforter she had to turn to. Maybe he didn't think it would be something he was good at - Edge's "comforting", at least for women, had always been something different than strictly emotional comfort, and that was no secret. The prospect of being the only real person who could do anything tangible to keep Rydia from breaking down under this stress might have been making him nervous. But that could have been because he knew no matter how much comforting he did, the end result sounded like it was going to be the same...and then he was the one who needed comforting.

Maybe he needed to talk to Rosa, even if it was going to drive him crazy not to tell her exactly what was going on. He couldn't talk to Rydia...and worry her more, and he wasn't that close to anyone in the kingdom now that his parents were...gone. Yes, then...he had to talk to Rosa sometime before this all came to a head and it drove him to a breaking point.

But that was another arrangement for another time, and Edge had only provided a nod of understanding to hear about what Rosa knew. That meeting could come after he'd done what he could with his own hands to prevent this from coming...if Rydia would let him. The part of Edge that had been molded into a king's state of mind and held to a king's responsibilities told him she was right. Throwing his own troops through a portal when he had seen firsthand what could happen on the other side was absolutely ludicrous, no matter how much preparation they made. Edge was sure any one of his men would go along with it for most any reason, but what if some of them didn't come back? Their families would be just another burden on Rydia's mind, and she didn't need that kind of a burden.

On the contrary, the side of Edge that was really Edge, down to flesh and bone, considered the prospect of not doing whatever damn thing he could for the girl - the woman - that he was essentially clinging to was one of the greatest crimes he could ever possibly commit. That part of him told him it was a betrayal of the highest order of someone he...well, he cared a lot about, and beyond the care he'd usually have for anyone around him aside from his parents. The whole thought of sitting idly by put a lump in his throat that he had to focus to talk over it. It was almost good he didn't quite notice her smile from his angle. Something out there was going to have to pay for doing this to them. "We'll feel it out," he managed to say, distracting himself with the thoughts of what he could do to figure out whether his little crusade against that machine in Spira would be fruitful. "And if that doesn't work, we'll move to the next plan of action. And if that doesn't work, the next."

But if they were going to do that...Edge was going to need her here with him. He hoped she would be happy with the arrangement, and sat on pins and needles until she finally confirmed that she would be. Her out there in the middle of nowhere, even if that middle of nowhere was her home, would be torture. "Good," he replied, quietly, pulling in a breath at his relief.

He was still releasing it as Rydia gave her thanks, and Edge couldn't help but let it out in the faintest huff, devoid of the amusement it would have indicated. That she brought this to him and him only was also a hard thing to take...maybe she cared as in return as much as he did, even if he'd wondered for quite a while if she ever would. But that was a completely selfish thought to have, and he knew it, so he shoved it away. "Anything you need...don't you dare hesitate to let me know," he threatened, managing a lighter tone as he gave her a little squeeze. "You're my priority right now."

And she would be for a long, long time, he had a feeling. If only it could be under better circumstances...

Words - 919
Muse - Excellent!
Notes - I actually liked this one a little. :0[/size]

[Rydia]

Rydia wasn’t sure how she was doing it. How she was keeping herself from exploding into a swirl of emotions, she’d already had somewhat of an outburst before, but nothing that could be as bad as it should be. She should be wailing and worrying about the future, or rather, the lack of future she would have, but instead here she was putting smiles on her face, trying to see the bright side and hold onto what little hope she had left. Even still, there was some form of optimism lingering around her, keeping her in check and keeping her emotions from spilling over, besides, no man wanted to deal with that right? Even if Edge was a good friend to her, there was no need to whine and complain to him about everything that worried her, she’d never throw that kind of burden on his shoulders, nor Cecil’s, nor Rosa’s…no one else. It was mostly just getting it off her chest that made her feel better.

Though simply speaking about something wasn’t bound to make the summoner feel better altogether, at least there was a tiny weight lifted from her shoulders by letting Edge in on what the problem was. With someone else knowing, it really didn’t feel like the entire weight of the world was on her shoulders anymore, she felt like there was someone she could complain to should she need to, someone who knew the situation…and cared about what happened to her. That was another significant thing that made Rydia feel better in some ways. The idea of going back to Spira, after the exact fal’cie that had branded her, it made her feel almost a bit bad. Putting lives at risk…Rydia didn’t want that, they could find another way around this, and like he said, if one plan didn’t work, they’d move to the next, and the next after that until they were really out of any alternatives. Giving him a small nod of understanding, Rydia didn’t feel the need to preach anything about that topic, simply…letting her silence take over, which for once it wasn’t so haunting. She wasn’t thinking about the bad things…she was thinking about maybe the possibility to find some sort of loophole, the bright future she wanted to find.

Staying in Eblan, normally Rydia probably would’ve protested, insisting that home was where she needed to be, even in the worst of times…but thinking about her own sanity, about her own well being, why would throwing herself into solitude, into more responsibilities…how would that help her? Being around someone who was well informed about the situation, someone who she enjoyed talking to on most occasions, and obviously someone who was willing to allow her into their home, how could she reject something like that? It was too kind of an offer to turn down, especially when she knew how much she would be effected if she went to Mist. Taking on the responsibility of helping rebuild the town, being somewhat of a leader, and dealing with all of this alone? It was never good to take things on a solo route. That’s why she was taking things slowly, baby steps if you will, and being sure not to let herself drift into solitude, she knew that loneliness like that could easily destroy someone, there wasn’t time to deal with that as well.

With a few blinks of her eyes, she looked back towards Edge for a moment, especially at his threat, a friendly threat at that. Oxymorons everywhere! Moving on. Rydia gave him a small nod with a half hearted smile, though not completely there. “Yes sir, I’ll be sure to do that, but you have to not worry so much. In the end things generally work out. We simply have to believe that this is one of those times…that good things happen, no matter how unfortunate something may seem.” She ended her words there, simply letting her voice trail away as well as her thoughts. She was ready to take a break from thinking about all of this…from her focus, to how she was feeling…Rydia wanted a break, and nothing more.

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Words:[/color] 802
Muse:[/color] Good!
Tagged:[/color] Edge
Wearing:[/color] Her usual.
Listening To:[/color] Into the West: Annie Lennox
Notes:[/color] Were...we gonna end it here? :0 or keep going?