Sorceress Ultimecia

[franviera]

Ultimecia was walking around her castle in the future and as she was walking around her minions got bored of being guarding this castle and they attacked Ultimecia.
"How dare you to attack me? I will have to teach you true fear." yelled she as Sphinxara attacked her. It was a hard battle because the seals that the sorceress made actually took their effects on her and she could only fight using her physical strenght which...wasn't that strong. After her victory over one of her guardians she regained her Magic powers and also Sphinxara followed her again.

After the defeat of her first enemy, she headed to the basement to find her now new enemy, Iron Giant. She defeated it with such an ease because of her magic spells. Then she unlocked the seal of her special abilities. As she went on walking around her castle she found Tri-Point and Krysta teaming up together. It was a hard battle for Ultimecia as they both were strong if they'd fight solo. With a slight luck she managed to defeat both, thanks to her pretty strong magic, called Apocalypse.

When she entered her room with paintings she solved her puzzle for the unknown painting she had. It was called Vividarium et intervigilium et viator which translates to: In the garden, sleeps a messenger. Then Trauma did a sudden-attack towards Ultimecia.
It was an easier fight then the one before so she had an upper hand during the whole fight. After this small fight she headed to her balcony where she found Tiamat a dragon, she defeated by using her GF, Griever and then the one and only monster left was a Behemoth that Ultimecia took down as last because it was the strongest out of them. Ultimecia used her best skills to defeat it and it almost managed to get the head of the witch but, that wasn't this easy for it to do.

Later when she defeated all of the guardians only one was left.... the one, called OmegaWeapon. She doesn't know about that this strong monster was in her castle but well a challenge is a challenge so she raised her dukes to fight."Fate does not smile upon you." said she before the final fight took place between her and OmegaWeapon.

Unfortunately for Ultimecia her foe had an upperhand during their fight. "Time to show my true power. "
Said she as she junctioned herself to Griever and attacked her enemy with Hell's Judgement which weakened her enemy but still OmegaWeapon counterattacked with an attack that almost defeated the sorceress of time, but luckily she could use her most powerful magic spell, Apocalypse and shortly after it,"Time! Playtime is over!... Eternal sleep." said Ultimecia before she used Time Compression to defeat Omega.

After she solved everything in her castle she got back to her room and sat down to her throne and she was surprised to see a portal to appear in her Throne room. "What the? Why is this portal here? I didn't place it here..." said she and the witch headed to investigate the new portal


words: 514

[Noctis Lucis Caelum]

I'm afraid I'm going to have to turn this one down.

While the dialogue does capture Ultimecia well, the scenario proves rather out-of-left-field and displays very little personality from her (in fact, it deviates from her personality - Ultimecia's far too proud of an individual to fight physically like a common brawler). It's more just a display of what the character can do, which kind of leaves everything about the character herself, which is more important in our roleplay, out on the porch.

So I'll have to make this a denial. With two acceptances, this won't matter, but another denial and we'll have to ask for a fresh audition if you'd like to try again.

[Serah Farron]

I’m afraid I have to deny this audition as well.

I feel like you tried to squeeze too much into a single scene, and you didn’t have enough description to make it work. There’s also the personality bit… from this audition, I’m having some trouble determining whether you truly understand Ultimecia’s character or not, as you don’t really show us any of her thoughts, just a few lines of dialogue that would fit most villain characters.

What I recommend is that you either rewrite or edit your current audition and treat it as though it’s an opening post for a thread on the site. Describe the scene and the actions that take place within the scene, show us why and how things happen, and most importantly, show us why Ultimecia acts the way she does, the easiest way to accomplish that is by describing her thoughts. One of her minions is attacking her, how does this make her feel? Angry? Disappointed? Amused? A portal suddenly appears in her chambers, and she must have some thoughts on that, I’d imagine.
Your audition also didn’t match the 500 words rule, and while I wouldn’t deny this audition based on just that, in this case, it’s just one more thing that doesn’t add up.

For now, I’m sorry to say that this audition has been denied, but don’t let that discourage you completely. You can use the advice that was given to you and give it another shot, if you’d like. Good luck!